Chapter 8

“So we just kill it while it’s in the cage and collect the ectoplasm for the sand witches?” Keevan asked, standing with the group in front of the monstrosity caged before them.

“We did agree to that,” Brody said.

“It doesn’t seem very sportsman-like,” Kylie said.

“I know what you mean, dear,” Helen said. “Is there anything else we could do?”

“We could tow the creature back to the desert cavern and leave it for the sand witches,” Groll suggested.

“That would take too much time,” Brody said. “I don’t want to miss our window of opportunity.”

“Then we leave it here,” Kylie said. “It’s not going anywhere. And we can bring it back to the sand witches on our way back out.”

Brody looked up at Groll who shrugged. Helen and Keevan also shrugged, picking up their packs from the ground at their feet. The group wordlessly walked over to the boat at the dock, leaving the caged monster on the beach along with their discomfort.

The boat was a small sloop with a single mast, but with more than enough room for the five adventurers to walk around. The cargo hold was small, as it seemed the Arachmen transported their goods in magical floating cages instead of the hold. The most interesting feature of the boat - aside from the shimmering, silvery material from which it was constructed - was a pair of horns near the bow sticking up like a bull’s, acting as a figurehead.

Kylie's spirits seemed to visibly lift as she stepped onto the boat. Her eyes widened and a wild grin spread across her face. The others also seemed to pick up on her excitement and it reflected back at her. 

“Alright, crew! First, this proud vessel needs a name!” Kylie shouted once she stood on the deck, adopting a dramatic pose by raising a dagger into the air. “I will name her ‘Bullship’ due to her glorious horns!”

Helen lifted an eyebrow at Kylie’s choice of name for the ship. Groll just shook his head.

“Avast, ye sea dogs!” Kylie shouted once more. “Hoist the sails! Man the rigging!”

The adventurers stood on the deck, looking around at the various ropes and folds of canvas arrayed about the boat. 

“So, does anyone know how to sail?” Keevan asked.

The adventurers all looked around and shrugged, shaking their heads.

“Wait, so nobody knows how this thing works? Seriously?” Kylie said, exasperated. “How am I supposed to be a proper ship captain?!”

“Do you know how to sail?” Groll asked.

“Well, not exactly. But… Uhh… Swab the poop deck!” Kylie said, grasping for any terms she knew even remotely related to sailing.

Groll walked over to the side of the boat and lifted a massive oar. “I think we’ll have to use these.”

Keevan looked on dubiously as Brody walked over and grabbed another of the incredibly long oars. There were four oars total, and they seemed to fit in the oarlocks of the sloop. There were little cut-outs in the hull with a sort of brace that seemed to perfectly fit the shafts of the oars.

“You really think we can row this thing? With those?” Keevan asked.

“One way to find out,” Brody said, placing an oar in one of the oarlocks. “Let’s get four in at once.”

“I don’t know if you noticed,” Kylie said. “But there are five of us. Who doesn’t have to row? I vote for the captain, which would be me.”

“Sorry, dear,” Helen said, standing next to one of the oarlocks. “I’m afraid my stature means I have to sit this one out.”

Kylie and Keevan both groaned and simultaneously collapsed to the deck in exaggerated anguish. Helen laughed as she settled herself on one of the built-in benches near the bow of the sloop.

Kylie and Keevan eventually stopped moaning and dragged their oversized oars over to their own oarlocks and attached them. They sat opposite each other about ten feet behind Groll and Brody. Brody called out “Heave!” but then Groll and Keevan both smacked the dock with their oars. Kylie and Brody also pushed the boat up against the dock, scraping it against the pilings.

“Oops,” Groll said, then hopped down to the dock to untie them. After untying the boat, the orc climbed back aboard the sloop and used his oar to shove them away from the dock.

“How’s the hull by the bow, Helen?” Kylie called over her shoulder. “Did it get damaged?”

“It looks fine, dear,” Helen called, peering over the railing.

“How are things over on the aft hull, Brody?” Kylie asked, a big grin on her face. “Is there a crack in the aft hull?”

Brody stood and looked over the side of the boat. “It looks to be in good shape.”

“Must be squats,” Kylie said under her breath, smiling.

Once they were away from the pier, Brody called out when to row again. They all got their oars in the water, but it did not go according to plan. They weren’t synchronized, and some pulled harder than others. So the boat jerked a bit and drifted to one side.

It took over twenty minutes of directions being called out, arguing, and a lot of raised voices in general before they finally found their rhythm and were able to get the boat moving steadily. After about twenty more minutes of that, Kylie and Keevan were drenched in sweat and exhausted.

“I’m about ready… to keel over,” Kylie said between tugs on the oar.

“You can keep this up a bit longer before we break,” Brody said, trying to be encouraging. “You’re an Undefiler!”


The scene shifts to Brody seated on the deck of the sloop.


“Adventurer Tip: It’s important to keep a steady rhythm. Stroking frantically just won’t get the job done,” Brody said with a nod.


The scene shifts back to the adventurers, all sitting on the deck of the sloop. None were at their rowing stations, but they had what appeared to be deer jerky in hand.


“It’s quite peaceful out here, don’tcha know,” Helen said softly.

The waves gently rocked the boat. Water stretched past the horizon, though they could still make out the land and forest behind them in the distance. The air had grown cooler and the scent of pine trees had all but been replaced by the smell of the lake itself. Seabirds were starting to become less common now, their calls only occasionally breaking the tranquility.

“You only say that because you didn’t have to row,” Kylie groused, rubbing at one arm.

“I think I would be quite happy living on a boat,” Keevan said.

“You? You would be a sailor?” Kylie asked, incredulous.

“Of course not,” Keevan replied huffily. “I said I would be happy living on a boat, not working on one. I would have people for that, of course.”

Helen, Kylie, and Groll chuckled at that, shaking their heads in wonderment at the aspirations of their simple mage.

“And what would you do with this boat and crew you had to pay to cart you around?” Kylie asked. 

“I would… sell things. I guess. Be a merchant. They have boats, right?” Keevan replied.

“Some do, yes,” Groll said. “But a boat this size would cost considerably more than we make in a year. As a team.”

Keevan blanched at that. “Really?”

“You betcha,” Helen replied. “Besides. You won’t want to live on a boat once you have to go number two.”

Keevan looked around, searching for something.

“Where is the toilet?” Keevan asked, finally.

“There,” Helen said, pointing at the water.

“How do you even… How does one… I didn't even think of that.” Keevan finally said.

“I’ve been thinking about it for the last half-hour,” Helen grumbled, slightly embarrassed. “It won’t be easy.”

“Well,” Kylie said, standing and tucking away her deer jerky. “There goes my appetite. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but can we row some more?”

“After a quick break,” Helen said, standing.

Groll walked over to Helen and whispered, “You grab onto a rope and squat over the side.”

The dwarf nodded to the big orc, grateful. She walked over to the side of the boat, gripped what she hoped was a loose rope, and looked over the side at the water.

“Alright. Turn around, now,” Helen said.

Helen began loudly humming, a tune that all of them decided to take up once they realized its purpose. Even Keevan started singing along, though it was clear he didn’t know exactly why the group decided to break out into song. The others also decided to take their own break, whether for the experience itself or because their diet was not conducive to a more regular experience is up in the air.

It was the elf’s turn next, and he gripped the rope with both hands and braced himself against the boat with his feet. Upon reaching that position, he realized he didn’t have a free hand to hike up his robes. His face contorted in concentration and a translucent purple hand appeared and began to take hold of the hem of his robes. Once gripped in the magical hand, he commanded it to lift and set about his business.

He was a bit lost in thought and apparently forgot to command the hand to stop lifting, however. The robe went over his head and that broke his concentration on the spell, which made the hand disappear. Which made his robes fall. Which, of course, made him reflexively grab for the robes to keep them up. With his hands that were holding the rope.

The splash was audible above the singing of the adventurers and they all turned around to see Keevan spluttering and splashing about in the water, his robe floating up around him.

No one laughed, though it was clearly a visible effort from Kylie to keep it in. After all, no one wanted to laugh at Keevan only to fall in themselves when it was their turn. They hauled in the sopping mage and took their respective breaks.

Keevan used a spell to dry himself off and the group got back to rowing. It didn’t take nearly as long to get back into their rhythm this time, and they stared back at the quickly-disappearing land they left behind.

“I see it,” Helen said, peering over the railing. “I see land directly ahead of us.”

The pronouncement quickly caused everyone to fumble in their strokes and lose their rhythm. They all got up from their seats and walked to the bow, peering into the distance at the thin line on the horizon. The group stared at that land as if trying to unravel its secrets.

“This is a big lake,” Keevan said, breaking the silence.

“Yes,” Brody said, peering at the water and then the sky. “It is. If we continue at our previous pace, we should get there before dark.”

Brody walked away from the bow and settled back into his position, awaiting the others with oar in hand. Kylie and Keevan both audibly groaned at the prospect of rowing again, but they followed Groll back to their positions and picked up where they left off. 

Hours passed, but Helen was able to make out details about the land as they got closer. There was a dock a ways off to the right, but there was no beach and no large forest like there was on the other side of the lake. Instead, steep cliffs rose high into the air. It appeared as if a mountain sprang from the water itself. Boulders and jagged rocks the size of wagons spread out around where the mountain met the water, and it was onto one of those that the dock was attached.

“Bring us to your left,” Helen called to the rowers.

“How?” Keevan asked, nearly out of breath.

“On the count of three, Groll and Keevan stop rowing,” Brody said, beginning his count.

After a few strokes from just Brody and Kylie, Helen called out once again. “Okay, we’re pointed at the dock, now.”

“Are there patrols? Any danger?” Brody asked, clearly wishing he could spare the moment to look for himself.

“None that I can see,” Helen said. “I can’t even see anywhere we can go. It just looks like rock to me, dear. Maybe this is the wrong place?”

“We’ll dock there anyway,” Brody said. “I wouldn’t put it past the Arachmen to have a secret entrance to their evil lair.”

Groll gave Brody a sidelong look but kept rowing at pace. The orc was clearly uncomfortable with how dismissive Brody was of the Arachmen, but he had already voiced his objections.

When the boat finally came close enough to dock, a lot of shouting occurred. Helen tried giving directions and telling who to row and when and they argued back when she changed her mind and, overall, general chaos ensued. When they finally did come to a stop, it was when they wedged the boat between two rocks about twenty feet away from the dock.

“Well,” Helen said. “That was certainly exciting.”

“We jammed it in there, tight,” Brody said, looking over the bow of the boat at where it was lodged between the two rocks. “I don’t think it will go anywhere.”

Brody began shoving repeatedly against the railing of the boat as if trying to rock it out of place. He threw his whole body into it several times before finally giving a satisfied nod.

“Let’s stick together,” Brody said. “And keep your eyes open. Arachmen are known to set traps that could snare even the most competent adventurer.”

The group hopped down from the boat onto the rocks, leaping from one rock to another to get closer to the mountain. Helen needed some assistance a few times, but they managed to traverse the difficult terrain without too much trouble at the beginning. 

"It's getting too dark. I can barely see the rocks!" Keevan whined. 

“Look up there!” Kylie called, pointing at a slight shadow on the cliff face. “It’s an indentation. Maybe a cave or something.

Kylie led the way, climbing up the rocks toward the spot she had located. The others followed, careful not to slip on the rocks that were slick from the spray of the waves crashing against them.

Groll extended his axe haft down to Helen and pulled her up the rest of the way to stand with the rest of the group. In front of them was a set of stone double doors that had to be at least a dozen feet wide and twice again as tall. Etched into the doors were depictions of ferocious wild boars savaging other animals, snarling with sharp tusks at the ready. 

Kylie stepped forward and put her hand against the handle of one of the doors as if about to push it open.

“Wait!” Groll said urgently. “One does not simply walk into boar doors. Shouldn’t you check it for traps?”

“Of course!” Kylie said, blushing a bit. “That’s exactly what I was doing.”

The half-elf began running her hands along the smooth stone, feeling the bumps and ridges of the scenes carved there. She pulled out a knife and ran it along the seams. She licked her palm and held it over parts of the gaps in the door, checking for airflow. Then, she turned around and rubbed her butt against both handles, her face serious.

“What was that for?” Keevan asked.

“It’s the most important part,” Kylie said somberly. 

Keevan looked confused. Then, Kylie stepped away from the doors, looking satisfied.

“Alright, Groll,” the half-elf said. “It looks good to me. Go ahead and open it.”

Groll just looked at her, unamused. Brody stepped forward and put his hand a good foot above the door handle, pushing it open.

“Oh man,” Kylie said, disappointed. “You’re no fun.”

Keevan summoned his orb of light, willing it to float a couple of feet above his head. Together, the group pushed into the darkness beyond.